Alex's Story Book

Title: The Runaway
Author: alexcat
Type: Gen
Fandom: LOTR
Rating: G
Disclaimer: I do not own nor do I profit from the use of these characters.
Warnings: None
Beta: None
Characters: Legolas and a dwarf
Archive: OEAM, Ao3, Alex’s Story Book
Author’s Note: Almost done for April
Spoilers: No
Summary: Legolas runs away from home.

~~~

THE RUNAWAY

Legolas didn’t want to run away but he decided that Papa didn’t want him around so he was going to find a new home with someone who wanted him. Maybe he’d live with some dwarves! That would teach Papa a lesson.

He packed up his important things in a small pack, his smooth rocks, his box of lucky coins from some travelers that papa had let pass through and his stuffed bunny, Hops. He put in one pair of pants and one shirt. That should be enough.

He left before his father got up, making sure no one saw him go and he headed toward the Misty Mountains. Maybe there’d be dwarves there. He wondered if they ate elflings…

After he walked for hours and hours, which was really maybe half an hour in actual time, he got so tired that he had to sit down and rest. Pretty soon he was looking up into the scariest face he’d ever seen.

“Don’t eat me!” he yelped as the dwarf lifted him to his feet.

“I haven’t eaten any elflings in a long time. They tend to be rather chewy. Who might you be?”

“I am Legolas of – I’m just Legolas.”

“Might you have a father?”

“He don’t need me about. He says I’m underfoot.”

“I don’t see a foot on top of you. You look like a perfectly good elfling to me.”

“I can be your son then. I’d make a good dwarf. My house is in a cave too.”

“I have a son already and he is a fine son.”

“He’s not underfoot?”

The dwarf laughed. “Sometimes he is but I like him anyway, just as I suspect your father likes you.”

“It’s getting late, isn’t it? I’m hungry.”

The dwarf smiled. It was not yet noon but obviously the boy had run off without breakfast. “I’ll give you an apple that my son picked for me and then we’ll get you back to your father before you miss any more meals. I’m sure if you have a mother, she will not think you underfoot. Mothers do not think that way.”

Legolas had forgotten that he hadn’t told his mother. She might cry if he didn’t go back!

He told the dwarf where he lived and took his hand as they both walked back toward his home in the Green Wood. When they came close enough for little Legolas to find his way, the dwarf turned to him.

“Go on with you then and maybe they won’t even notice.”

Legolas nodded and walked away. He turned back.

“You didn’t tell me your name.”

“I am Gloin. Maybe we shall meet again someday.”

Little Legolas bowed to him and ran home. Gloin smiled. That one reminded him of his own son, Gimli. Best get home. He promised to take Gimli hunting.

~end~

Title: Indiana Jones and the Spoiled Brat
Author: alexcat
Type: FCH-ish
Fandom: Indiana Jones
Rating: G
Disclaimer: I do not own nor do I profit from the use of these characters.
Warnings: None
Beta: None
Pairing: Indy/Marion
Archive: Ao3, Alex’s Story Book
Spoilers: No
Summary: Marion Ravenwood was a spoiled brat.

~~~

INDIANA JONES AND THE SPOILED BRAT

Marion Ravenwood was a spoiled brat and Indy wished she’d stay at home like a girl should instead of trailing after her father all the time. She was always underfoot, asking stupid questions and telling him he was wrong when he knew he was right. Abner was a fool to let this slip of a girl tell him what to do. He’d send her off to boarding school if she were his kid.

“Indy, are you listening?” Marion asked for the third time.

“What? What is it?”

“Look at this writing. I think it warns of a trap.”

He looked at the ancient writing on the stone. It was indeed a warning. It warned of a curse, which could be a booby trap or poison, usually. From the way the path looked so easy, he was sure it was a trap instead of poison.

“I’ll go first. I am more experienced at finding traps,” he said as he moved in front of Marion, who was having none of it and elbowed him out of the way. The arrow trap almost got them both and would have if he’d not spotted it in time and pushed her to the ground.

“Get off me, you idiot!” she shouted as she pushed at him.

“Thanks for saving me, Indy. You coulda said that, you know!”

“Why Father bothers with you, I don’t know. You’re never going to be an archaeologist.”

“I already am one. That’s why I’m here with him.”

“He just feels sorry for you!”

“I feel sorry for him! Having to put up with a silly child like you!”

Here he was, a grown man in his late twenties and he was totally beaten by this… this … child! He got up and marched off, leaving her in the dust. Why on earth such a sensible man brought this little harridan on a dig he’d never know!

He looked back at her. She sure was a pretty thing though with that long dark hair and those flashing eyes. Too bad she was too young for him. Maybe someday when she grew up.

~end~

Title: Another Day, Another Adventure
Author: alexcat
Type: Gen
Fandom: Indiana Jones
Rating: G
Disclaimer: I do not own nor do I profit from the use of these characters.
Warnings: None
Beta: None
Characters: Indiana Jones
Archive: Ao3, Alex’s Story Book
Author’s Note: I like Indy.
Spoilers: No
Summary: Another day, another adventure.

~~~

ANOTHER DAY, ANOTHER ADVENTURE

Indy was this close to grabbing the idol that he’d been sent to find when a hurricane blew in and destroyed any hope he had of getting back into the caves without at least a demolition crew to open them back up. He didn’t want that much attention on what he sought so he went home empty handed.

So back to the classroom for him and all those silly girls giggling at everything he said. Didn’t they realize he was old enough to be father to most of them? Maybe he should take the offer to search for Noah’s Ark. It paid well but he didn’t like looking for items that tended to make one a lunatic who spent his whole like on a wild goose chase, like his father’s quest for the Grail.

He looked through his mail and saw a note with no return address but the writing looked familiar somehow. He opened it.

Dearest Indy,

I stumbled upon some information about some ruins under the sea off the west coast of Africa. The information is from as reliable source, as reliable as most of our sources anyway. Care to join me in searching for Atlantis?

S.

It must be very reliable if Sallah was willing to leave Egypt to look for it. It was a search to make or break a man though. That much was for sure. Just like his father. Dammit! He picked up the phone as asked for the international operator.

~end~

Title: Camelot Undone
Author: alexcat
Type: FCH
Rating: PG-13
Fandom: Arthurian Legend
Disclaimer: I do not own them. They belong to the ages and are therefore in the public domain.
Warnings: None
Beta: None
Pairing: Guinevere and Lancelot
Archive: OEAM, Ao3, Alex’s Story Book
Author’s Note: This is from legend, not the awful tv show or any movie.
Spoilers: Only if you don’t know the legends.
Summary: The lovers discuss their sin.

~~~

CAMELOT UNDONE

“Do you love him still, my Lady?” Lancelot asked as he smoothed back golden hair that had come undone from the pins and ribbons that had held it.

“I will love him as long as I have breath in me, as will you, dear Lancelot.”

Lancelot lay back on their bed of soft grass and sighed as he looked up into the blue sky. “Then why do we betray him as we do?”

“As much as I love him, he will never be completely mine. He belongs to this kingdom, to destiny more than he ever will me,” Guinevere said as she sat up. She turned her head to look at her lover.

“Does that give us the right?”

She laughed bitterly. “Of course not. Don’t be a fool. We are damned for what we have done. I only hope that by our actions, we have not damned him also in the eyes of God.”

“Would God do that?” Lancelot asked as if she alone could answer him.

“I know not the mind of God.”

“Nor do I. Perhaps we should give up this foolishness before it dooms us all.”

“I fear we are too late for that, my dearest knight.”

The day was drawing to a close as the sky began to darken almost imperceptibly. The queen and her knight dressed and returned to the castle, unaware that the man they had spoken of, Arthur himself, watched them silently from the shadows.

He did not blame them entirely nor was he as angry as he should have been. He knew they were right in all they said. That was the saddest part of all.

~end~

Title: The Sexy One
Author: alexcat
Type: FCHet
Fandom: SG-1
Rating: R
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters nor do I profit from their use.
Warnings: None.
Beta: None
Pairing: Vala/Cameron, Vala/Daniel
Archive: OEAM, Ao3, Alex’s Story Book
Author’s Note: I never tire of SG-1.
Spoilers: No.
Summary: Vala and her two men? One man? No men?

~~~

THE SEXY ONE

Vala Mal Doran had loved Daniel Jackson since she beat the crap out of him. She liked the way he looked and smelled and even the way he’d outsmarted her. His disdain since she’d come to the SGC did nothing at all to dampen the way she felt. Someday he’d get it. Really he would.

On the other hand, Vala Mal Doran had wanted Cameron Mitchell ever since she’d first when she came through the gate at the SGC. She thought he was sex on legs. Having him tied to the bed in his underwear had done nothing to dispel that notion. He’d hooked up with an old girlfriend at the class reunion but she was sure if she’d wanted him, she could have had him then.

Tonight, she she’d have him for sure. Cam asked her to go to some sporting event with him – basketball, hoops or something. She accepted. How bad could it be? After that was done, they’d have a lovely romp in the hay.

She dressed in her sexiest undies, some she’d gotten when she and Carter had gone to Victoria’s Secret. Over them, she wore tight jeans and a black sweater with a very low neckline. She imagined Cam drooling over her and leaving the game early to get her home and in bed.

An hour later, she sat in a crowded basketball stadium, eating messy hot dogs and drinking warm beer, watching as Mitchell yelled mild obscenities at the tall men down on the court. How sexy!

Two hours later, her jeans. Sweater and undies lay in various places all over the bedroom.

“Thank you so much! I thought I’d die of boredom,” Vala whispered as she reached her arms out to pull a very naked Daniel Jackson into the bed with her. So much for the sexy one!

~end~

Title: Castiel Reads Fanfiction
Author: alexcat
Type: FCS
Fandom: Supernatural
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I do not own nor do I profit from the use of these characters.
Warnings: Silliness
Beta: None
Pairing: Cas/Dean
Archive: OEAM, Ao3, Alex’s Story Book
Author’s Note: Today’s post at LJ was about fanfiction and authors who oppose or condone it so I thought I’d take a silly pass at the subject via Supernatural, which does nod at fanfiction now and again.
Spoilers: No
Summary: Cas finds slash fanfiction and asks Dean about it.

~~~

CASTEIL READS FANFICTION


Castiel slammed the computer shut when Dean came back into the motel room. He looked very guilty. Dean wondered what he’d been up to.

“Cas? Been looking at porn?” Dean grinned knowingly. That’s what he did online but at least he looked at real girls. Sam liked anime porn!

Cas turned even redder but shook his head. “Dean, have you heard of this thing called fanfiction?”

Dean laughed. He’d caught Sammy looking at it a few times. “Yeah, I know about it. Have you ever read those books that Chuck wrote?”

“I’ve seen one or two. They actually are fairly accurate. But these fanfiction writers write things about me and you being… um, us being intimate in a way that men… angels don’t do.” His blush deepened even further.

Dean grinned a near evil grin. “What do you mean, Cas?” He loved torturing Cas this way.

“I read a story about you having a baby. My baby!”

“Well, those fangirls get way out there sometimes.”

“But how would you even get pregnant? You’re a man.”

“Really? You don’t know?” He leaned close and whispered into Castiel’s ear what men did to one another in those stories, what they did to one another in real life too.

“Is – why – really? People really actually do that? Oh!”

“I don’t but yeah, some people do.”

“Do men kiss?”

“For real?” Dean was getting warmed up to the subject. “Sure. Why not?”

Cas looked at him really hard for a minute then he closed his eyes.

“What is it?” Dean asked.

“I’m waiting.”

“For what?”

“For you to kiss me, Dean. You always say I need to learn to act like a person. If men kiss, then I want you to kiss me. ”

Dean didn’t do anything but stare at Cas, who finally opened one eye. “I’m still waiting,” Cas said and closed his open eye.

“What the hell? Why not?” Dean leaned close and kissed Cas on the lips.

Cas made a humming sound. “Why not indeed? Do it again.”

And he did. And again and again.

~end~

Title: The Grandmother
Author: alexcat
Type: FCH
Fandom: LOTR
Rating: G
Disclaimer: I do not own nor do I profit from the use of these characters.
Warnings: None
Beta: None
Pairing: Wait and see.
Archive: OEAM. Ao3, Alex’s Story Book
Author’s Note: Um, yeah. The ideas are getting a bit thin!
Spoilers: Not really
Summary: A grandmother looks back for moment.

~~~

THE GRANDMOTHER

The old woman sat in her rocker by the fire. She was knitting a cap for one of her great- grandchildren, one that hadn’t been born yet. Funny that no matter how many children and grandchildren and now great-grandchildren she had, each one was special and unique and she loved them individually. Love really did seem to multiply but the number of people you loved.

She thought back many years and smiled to herself. Her children knew her as Ma and as the wife of a Prince. But they didn’t know everything about her. Not at all.

She remembered that awful day, that horrible day on Pelennor Fields. The day she lost her uncle. The day she almost lost her life. The day she killed the Witch King and turned the tide of the battle. She’d never told her children anything of those days and had forbade their father from ever telling them.

It seemed silly now that she had wanted to marry Aragorn. But she had. She had loved him in her own way and would have grieved when he married Arwen but for Faramir. She’d learned to love him in the days after the battle, in the days in the infirmary. How she loved him. She missed him so much these days, his smile, his quiet authority, his goodness. Sometimes a person had no real idea what they had until it was gone from them.

But she knew now she’d not have to wait long. She’d not live to see this great-grandchild born in the summer. She didn’t want to leave her children but it was time. Time to join Faramir once again.

Perhaps she could teach him to ride like the wind like the Rohirrim did. It was something she’d always wanted to do but life had gotten in the way and they’d never just gone out riding.

Riding… she could almost feel her horse beneath her…

~end~

Title: Soup’s On
Author: alexcat
Type: FCGen
Fandom: LOTR
Rating: G
Disclaimer: I do not own nor do I profit from the use of these characters.
Warnings: None
Beta: None
Characters: Legolas and Gimli
Archive: OEAM Ao3, Alex’s Story Book
Author’s Note: This would have taken place after the end of ROTK when Legolas and Gimli wandered about.
Spoilers: No
Summary: Gimli goes hunting for dinner.

~~~

SOUP’S ON

Legolas Greenleaf sat by the fire, waiting for Gimli to return from hunting. He wondered what the dwarf would bring back for their dinner. He’d shot a coney or caught a few fish the last few nights so tonight, Gimli decided that it was his turn to kill dinner.

Legolas knew that Gimli was great with large game, like bear or the wild beef that could be found out near Rohan but Legolas had never thought him stealthy enough for the small, quick animals of the forest. He’d just smiled when Gimli had said he was going hunting and not said a word.

He heard someone approaching and by the gait, it sounded like the dwarf. He poked the fire and waited.

Gimli was carrying something but it looked more like a bag than an animal. As he got closer, Legolas saw that it was a bag.

He waited for Gimli to say something.

“What? You’ve never seen a sack of potatoes before?”

Legolas raised an eyebrow.

“I said I was going to hunt dinner. I did not say what.”

Legolas laughed out loud and clapped him on the back. “No, you didn’t say what. Let’s see them. I think I have some spices still to make us a nice hot soup.”

“Just what I wanted too!”

So they made soup and ate it beside their fire. It was filling and tasted fine but not as good as roasted rabbit or some nice, large fowl would have. After dinner, Legolas tidied up their few bowls and spoons.

“I’m a better guard than you are so tomorrow, I’ll guard the camp and you can go back to finding dinner.”

“That would be fine,” Legolas agreed and not another word was said about it, though Legolas was never able to eat potato soup again without a smile coming to his face.

~end~

Title: Jack’s Day Off
Author: alexcat
Type: FCGen
Fandom: SG-1
Rating: G
Disclaimer: I do not own nor profit from these characters.
Beta: None
Warnings: None
Characters/Pairing: Jack O’Neill
Archive: OEAM, Ao3, Alex’s Story Book
Author’s notes: Just Jack.
Summary: Jack is not desk jockey.

~~~

JACK’S DAY OFF

Jack O’Neill sat in his office, bored to the marrow of his bones. He was supposed to be reading reports and signing papers. He was reading a comic book instead. Not a very good one, but it was better than work. He wished he’d retired before it came to this.

He wondered what SG-1 was doing right now. They were probably having some dangerous adventure. Or at least an interesting assignment.

Anything would be better than being stuck here in this damned office.

And an idea was born.

An awful wonderful idea.

Without a word to anyone, he packed a few things and got the first flight he could find out of DC to Colorado. He drove a rental to Cheyenne Mountain and headed to SGC. Walter was on duty. And General Landry was no where to be seen.

“How ya doin? Could you do me a favor?” He said to Walter.

“Of course, sir. What do you need?”

“I need a uniform and a gate address. I’m going on a mission.”

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?”

“I’m going to jump off of a building if I don’t do something useful. I am a general. And I’m sure it’s not a good idea.”

Walter had no real choice but to send him along to the planet SG-1 had gone to. It was an agrarian planet and the team was checking out rumors of Ori visits there.

Mitchell was shocked when General O’Neill came strolling into the village.

“Sir?”

“Need a new recruit?”

“Sir?”

“I got bored and decided to play hookie. I made Walter tell me where you were.”

“Well, we were just coming back. The rumors of Ori were just rumors so we’re heading back home.”

“Ever hear of King Arkhan I?” Jack asked him.

Mitchell looked blank for a second. “Arkhan…Harry Maybounre!”

“Harry’s never met Vala or you either, for that matter. I’ve got the gait address.”

Off they went and were greeted enthusiastically by the King and his wives. They feasted and drank and told lots of stories and a few lies before gating home. For that one day, Jack O’Neill enjoyed his job again.

It would do for now.

~end~

Title: Riders of the White City
Author: alexcat
Fandom: LOTR
Type: Gen
Rating: G
Disclaimer: I do not own nor profit from the use of these characters.
Warnings: None
Beta: None
Characters: Faramir, Boromir
Archive: OEAM< Ao3, Alex’s Story Book
Author’s Note: Why not?
Spoilers: No.
Summary: The son of the Steward steal a few moments to be boys.

~~~

RIDERS OF THE WHITE CITY

Faramir was always thrilled when Father allowed Boromir some time away from his military studies and training. Those times were seldom and he meant to make every moment count. Who didn’t want to spend time with his older brother?

“What shall we play?” Boromir asked. He was several years older than Faramir but not too old yet for boyhood fun and games. He always asked Faramir what he wanted to do though this time the answer he got was not quite what he expected but his young brother was always full of surprises.

“Maybe we could be horse soldiers like the Rohirrim?”

“Maybe we could call ourselves Riders of the White City.” Boromir’s pride in his home was evident in his voice.

They ran to the stables and saddled their horses. The guard opened the gate as both of the sons of the Steward raced through. Before he closed the gates back, he nodded to the third rider who would watch after them from afar, making sure they were safe.

“This is so much fun! We should ride all the way to Rohan and show them what fine horsemen we are!” Faramir shouted as Boromir let him race into the front.

“Maybe we should make a camp a little closer to home. Father might have need of us.”

The two boys unloaded their gear, foraged for dry firewood and put up a small tent. Boromir made fishing poles from young saplings along the river bank, using string and hooks he brought from home to complete them. Faramir was put to the task of hunting worms for bait. A few hours later, they ate their own fish, cooked on a rock over the fire. Not even a king’s kitchen had such grand food as they did.

“I wish Father would let me train like you do,” Faramir said rather wistfully.

“He will soon enough, brother. Enjoy these days. Sometimes I wish I could do this all the time instead of so much training.”

They lay down by the fire on their blankets and told stories and jokes late into the night. Faramir fell asleep in the middle of a story. Boromir put him in the tent and covered him with a blanket. Then he slept himself.

*

In later years, both brothers would remember this night as one of their favorite memories. It would be the story that Faramir told his own children about his boyhood in Gondor and about their uncle, the finest brother anyone ever had.

~end~